Squint update

I'm not sure if I've mentioned it on here, but mum noticed a turning in of Leo's eye so we took him to the docs and got a referral to the hospital.

He had that referral on Friday and the specialist thinks he does it a little in both eyes and she feels that it is him trying to compensate for being very long sited, which is a common thing in a babies as they are born long sited. She has however, referred us on to a consultant who will dilate his eyes and check the back and do a much more thorough investigation than she did. I'm not sure what she was and the difference between her and the consultant, but there is one. It could be after Christmas now so hopefully it won't be any worse by then.

3.30am is the new black!

Walk prep

This last week, Leo has decided that 3.30am is the best time to wake up and play. We aren't quite so convinced though. I think he is getting cold, not totally sure but it was warmer on Saturday night and he slept through just fine.

He's making so much toddler progress at the minute, walking around with us outside, new little noises and words being formed, he's started actively going to give us kisses (definitely the cutest thing so far!) and perhaps that's disrupting him a bit too?!

My fitness is on and off, as is the good eating. I hate myself every time I slip and I am being mega strict at work again, but the weekends are a killer or when Leo doesn't eat something, I think I have to eat it so it isn't wasted!

I've started doing classes again at the gym with the hope it will reignite my passion for it, the girl that does Wednesday morning spin is really quite dull, but it's the only morning I can do! I did circuits on Thursday lunch and that was great, I have suffered every day since with sore legs, but it's worth it!

I've decided I want to get creative for Christmas decorations, so I've made a start with drying out some lemon and lime slices for garlands and I have ordered some felt to go in with that. My other plan is for us all to go foraging for bits and pieces I can make decorations out of, twigs, foliage, conkers, leaves, basically anything none toxic or choke hazard size!

We aren't sure if we are going to have a traditional tree just yet, as I think Leo will assume it's just for tearing things off, so may well wait for next year for that and do something representational this year. Let's see how little I manage to get done, and/or how crap it looks before I concede and buy everything!

Merry Christmas

No, I haven't gone totally nuts just yet! We had early Christmas with the Burgin side of the family. Tom's sister, Holly, is going working in the ski resorts over Christmas so we all got together this weekend.

It was touch and go if we were going to make it as Leo was really poorly with a high temperature on Thursday and Friday, but he perked up enough to go we decided.

Party in the fire place!

It was great to see everyone and Leo was mostly happy, although as usual he struggled to settle to sleep there frustratingly. I think we need to get a better mattress for the travel cot, Tom and I went to bed really early as he was so unsettled and he ended up coming in to bed with us.

Christmas jumpers, and a sweat band obvs

He's so much more aware of his environment and he really takes his time to warm up to people. He likes to sit and observe and then come out of his shell a little at a time, that is something we will make sure we work with whenever he is in a new situation and we will certainly never force him out of that as we are both fairly introverted so understand it well.

Rejection

I got my first taste of baby rejection the other day and it was tough.  Leo was upset about something and he just kept pushing me away and wanting Daddy.

All other times something like that has happened he has always come to me, but he has really started favouring Tom recently and it hurts.. stupidly I know, but it does.

I am having to fight my childish impulses to just reject him back, which in itself is absolutely ludicrous, but I guess its a sort of self defence mechanism.  I know that if I give in to that I will just create a connection gap where there isn't one.  Why does he choose Tom over me? I have no idea, maybe I do the less fun things with him or maybe he just prefers his dad.  Human nature will always make us favour one person over all others and I guess I just need to accept that and remember my job is to guide and develop him through life and not be his best mate above all others and the sooner I get used to that the less painful it will be each time it happens.

My focus is help him be an amazing, confident and happy person and so far, he is just that.