Team work

Amazing Daddy, doing amazing daddying

We still have a poorly of pickle, he's loads better than he was but he's still recovering and he is horribly snotty and congested. He went down to sleep in his own cot last night, but we got him up and on us as he just kept choking on phlegm!

We took him out today for a walk and the fresh air really seems to have perked him up, he managed to go over 3 hrs between his snoozes and he hasn't done that since Wednesday. He is really struggling with his chest and coughing now too, I guess as the phlegm is drying up it is getting sticky and heavy on his chest.

He's been such a little trooper through it all, my mum has it now and she said if he's had it half as bad as she has then it's horrific!

I don't know how I would've managed it if it wasn't for Tom and being able to split the night shifts. My heart goes out to single mums more now than ever!

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Unnecessary guilt!

We have a poorly little pickle, really quite bad actually. It started the night before last and got worse yesterday afternoon. He has got really congested and has snot pouring down his little face as well as quite a raw sounding cough appearing in the night.

Tom and I took it in turns last night to have him sleep upright on us, as anything other than that made it hard for him to breathe. It's incredibly sad to listen to him struggling as I know myself that being unable to breathe through my nose drives me insane!

I feel guilty because I feel like I have failed to provide him with the immunity to fight it off before it got to this point. Totally irrational I know, but my breastmilk is supposed to help him to not be ill, and yes, I know it doesn't work miracles.. But it's my job to keep him safe and well

We are currently playing in the bathroom with some eucalyptus in the burner and the shower going for some steam, Leo is having a great game with the plunger and the door stop! He has plenty of other toys, but these are way more fun!

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Fooled you!

Togged up to go and meet daddy in town for lunch

Leo decided that the 12 hour sleep pattern was for losers last night and after hourly fidgets from midnight and me finally feeding him at 3.30, he was all happy smiles and wide awake. Tom took him and played with him for an hour and a half and then he came back and snooze for another hour and a half.

I now have no idea what is going on now and what schedule to aim for! It's a control freaks worst nightmare!

I am currently sat in a pub car park, with a sleeping baby in my arms after limping back from work between meltdowns, I just couldn't carry on at this point as he had got himself in a right state. Puffy eyes, choking on his cries etc, it breaks my heart. So I bounced him to sleep, wrapped in a scarf because it's so cold and I have just managed to get back into the car with him. Looks like I'm stuck here whilst he has a snooze, it's very sweet!

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Not for the routine addicts!

Lovely sunny day at the makers markets

Every time you get a routine nailed, it's guaranteed that your little sneak will switch it up on you!

Having transitioned from the swaddle, I expected nights of broken and shortened sleep. We had one, he has now gone from sleeping for just over 10 hours at night to over 12. His new wakeup time has been 7.30 for the last few days, so we decided to move bedtime to 7pm instead of 8, as a 7.30 start makes everything quite late for me.. We woke up at 7.20 this morning!

He fidgeted at 1.30 and I had managed to sleep through until then from 8.30! A miracle. I then fed him at 4, he has happily been distracted from his 2.30 feed now with a dummy, the only reason I feed at 4 instead of distraction is because my boobs can't take that sort of time out and I'm in drowning agony by 4 as it is. They need time to adjust to the new routine too!

So now, my carefully constructed routine is totally up in the air and I need to rethink.  He managed 2.5 hours awake first thing, half an hour longer than normal and he is currently up to an hour on this snooze. I think the aim now will be to get at least 4 hours awake time out if him before another nap this afternoon..

It's going to take some getting used to again, and all in time for him to switch it on up on me again.. And then, I will have to switch it up on him once I'm back in work as we need to leave the house by about 6.50 so that I can drop him with ruzina and be in the office for 8. Poor little man

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Trusting myself

This is a part of my personality that I battle with regularly. I constantly question my knowledge, intelligence and interpretation of information. I also worry that my opinion on something is going to upset people and they will get pissed off at constantly hearing me go on about something. It's always in context I might add, I don't bring things up randomly.

A constant lesson I am trying to teach myself is that if I am passionate about something, I have done my research and formed a valid opinion, then I should give that opinion and not be worried about who it upsets, if anyone. I also shouldn't care if people get annoyed by it, again, if it's something I feel passionate about and I know I am informed and not just spouting off, then I should have courage in what I am saying. I need to remember, that conflicting thoughts aren't there to stop me having an opinion. I am always so quick to blame myself in a situation and I need to knock that on the head once and for all. I want to make sure Leo never sees that side of me, I don't want him to fear rejection because of an opinion. I want him to understand that the people who walk away because of your valid and well informed opinion, were never destined to be a part of your world anyway, so nothing lost!

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The unswaddle is on!

I decided to bite the bullet at night and go for it! We put him into his zipedeezip the night before last and it went OK. He was really fidgety every couple of hours, so I didn't sleep so well, but I still only fed him once. I felt like last night was a vast improvement too, he still fidgeted but didn't need any intervention from me to assist in him staying asleep.

He was quite grouchy yesterday, I don't know if that was a coincidence or it had affected his sleep enough to make him feel tired. I also managed to misread his tired signs and totally mess up his sleeps through the day. I was working from home on and off, so mum had him and she said he was fine with her.. Perhaps he was just bored of my face!

We'll see how he gets on today. I feel less tired so that should be a gauge on his fatigue I reckon. He has also gone off well for his first snooze, so all is well so far.

No long and he will be ready to move into his own room.. Not sure I am ready for that though!

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The vitamin debate continues

There is so much conflicting advice regarding supplementation with vitamins at baby's 6 month's mark. I struggle to believe that a healthy baby, accessing milk from a healthy mother, requires supplements.

OK, I understand that no one can guarantee that they consume a perfectly balanced diet and therefor it is much safer for the health professionals to advise everyone to supplement.. But I'm still unsure.

As a rule, I don't like to not put faith in medical professionals as they have spent many years reading the literature and research, however, there are plenty of published professionals citing that it isn't necessary.

There is a vitamin supplement that doesn't contain any sugar (finally) but it contains the less efficient D2 rather than the activated version; D3. Not the end of the world I suppose as long as everything else in it is worth it and not detrimental to Leo's health. It also doesn't contain iron, and from things that I have read, thats a positive as long as your baby isn't deficient. Leo has no symptoms and there is absolutely no reason why he should, especially as my count was really high at birth point anyway, so he should be readily stocked. I don't want to add supplemental iron if I don't have to as it can affect the absorption of iron from the breastmilk and this is the most bioavailable form for them.

Its a mine field, it's such a concern that they could have a deficiency that could potentially damage their development, but at the same time I don't want to introduce anything into his little body, that isn't entirely necessary and is synthetic too.

Conclusion: decision pending!

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